Interim Report from the Angel of Doom

A Christmas carol.

First off, I must renew my objection to this extended assignment here on Earth. I’m sure you and the Office are quite aware how difficult it is for beings of our nature to maintain a corporeal form. I find it excruciatingly uncomfortable, and I look forward with great eagerness to my return to the Ethereal Realm.

That said, I can report various developments.

The humans are savaging each other with a ferocity that is surprising, even in such an advanced case of narcissistic self-supremacy. They seem to have no concept of compassion or mutual care. When it suits them, they treat each other like material things that can be destroyed at will. This has created a giant reservoir of evil and resentment, which is building up behind an ever-weakening dam of deception and self-delusion. We can expect the dam to break, at first gradually and then suddenly, loosing on the world a catastrophic flood of destruction and remorse.

This “collapse” is long-expected. Indeed, in some quarters it is anticipated with a regretful measure of eagerness. The pressure upon the minds and souls of the humans of Earth is not sustainable. Relief is necessary, even if that relief is occasioned by planetary catastrophe. The moment of climax is approaching!

Leaked Knowledge

One of my mandates here on Earth has been to seek the source of the “Knowledge of Good and Evil” which, as you know, was leaked to the humans early in their history. I understand this lapse in security has been the source of much controversy within the Office and that the search for the perpetrator is ongoing.

The “Knowledge of Good and Evil” (KGE) has encouraged the humans to use their rudimentary moral faculties to constantly pass judgement upon their fellow creatures and on their natural environment. Because humans do not possess a complete register of consciousness, their access to the KGE has resulted in a partial, imperfect, and unbalanced application of the power it provides.

They exercise the power indiscriminately, without regard for the consequences. They act as if their limited minds are the final authority in the Universe. One might even go so far as to say they have created an “idol” of their rational processes, worshiping their own intellectual power in an orgy of self-referential aggrandizement.

They are deaf to the cries of their fellow creatures and they close their eyes to the clear evidence that their trajectory is carrying them ever closer to destruction. The result is a world convulsed in activity, but without a guiding principle or spirit to give it meaning and to maintain its long-term equilibrium.

I recommend a thorough search of Office archives to discover which unruly being shared this powerful knowledge with creatures so unprepared to wield it!

Special Agent

You have asked for my recommendation with regard to the Special Agent. Yes, I think He ought to be re-deployed. The seasonal timing is correct: It is at this time of the Earth year that His message of peace and reconciliation is most likely to be received in the spirit in which it is intended.

Upon His first visit to Earth, the Special Agent suffered ignominious death and defeat. I understand that this was a deliberate stratagem — one might say a “ploy” — to persuade the human population to emulate His humble ways and thus to find redemption from their path of self-destruction. Suffice to say this stratagem has failed. The message of compassion and mutual care has fallen on deaf ears. Regrettably, stronger measures are required.

In light of the failure of His first mission here, I suggest that prior to re-deployment the Special Agent should be heralded by forces of substantial power. Perhaps some great storms, floods, famines, plagues, wars, and other impressive dislocations would be appropriate to pave the way for His arrival.

If He does come, it must be in His capacity as judge, rather than that of messianic prophet. The moral confusion here is so great that local authorities cannot be trusted to make the appropriate distinctions. The Special Agent should be provided with adequate intelligence from the Office archives so that the distinct destinies of the various creatures can be determined and the appropriate dispositions made.

The animals, of course, are innocent, and all their sufferings must be redeemed without penalty. The same is true of infant children and other pure souls. It is the adult humans who have partaken of the aforementioned KGE who must be adjudicated. As usual, the Code of Eternal Mercy should ameliorate an otherwise strict application of the principles of cosmic justice.

Conclusion

I hope this report provides the Office with a useful perspective on the destiny of Earth. The planetary project has overall been adequately successful, with the establishment of viable ecosystems and the creation of much beauty and harmony in the natural environment.

The human part of the experiment has, sadly, failed. The attempt to create a race of beings “between the animals and the gods,” as it were, has not found success. The premature introduction of the “Knowledge of Good and Evil” irretrievably corrupted the project by bestowing Angel-like powers of discernment upon a beastly species. The unprecedented mixture of wisdom and lust engendered by this mishap has created a maelstrom of physical and moral confusion, not subject to simple remedy.

What is certain at this point is that the area must be cleansed in preparation for further efforts; that is to say, balance must be restored. I recommend the deployment of the Special Agent to separate what should be preserved from what must be discarded, and to execute the appropriate remedial measures.

Finally, on a personal note: I renew my request to be relieved of the onerous duty to which I have been assigned in this corporeal realm. I believe I am developing a rash.

Most sincerely yours,

/s/ The Angel of Doom

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